Redneck Bar & Grill
Beer, Friends, Food
Now I’ve been in the mud, but this takes the prize! Aren’t you glad your commute to work is cleaner than this?
This and more at Funny Pictures.
Last night an enebriated Saint Nick got behind the wheel of a loaded freight sleigh and ran down an innocent old lady out for a walk. She was discovered in the early morning covered with reindeer hoofprints and sleightracks. The family of the woman are devastated and refused to be interviewed at this time. Authorities are currently on the lookout for the suspect, but he has not yet returned to the north pole.
It seems that this year everyone left Santa out a bottle or can of beer and some hot wings instead of the traditional milk and cookies. One beer would be bad enough, but imagine hundreds of houses. The milk and cookies only made Santa jolly and fat. The beer would still gave him a belly, but even Santa shouldn’t drink and drive.
I was out and about today, taking care of business, and I heard that classic song, "The Twelve Days of Christmas". I was reminded of Bob and Doug McKenzie’s version, which is without a doubt the best cover of it ever made. When the song first starts out they sing, "On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, a beer." Provided it’s a Blue Beaver Beer, what more could anyone possibly ask for (well maybe a two-four). This in turn reminded me of one of my favourite holiday traditions; the 24 beers of Christmas. I like to start at about 6 p.m. on Christmas Eve and I drink one Blue Beaver per hour every hour for twenty four straight hours. You should keep one extra one in the fridge so that you can offer it to Santa when he slides down your chimney and the two of you can drink a toast to the holiday season. At 6 p.m. Christmas Day I have supper with the family. After supper there is a special drink that I like to indulge in; you mix a half cup of heated egg nog, a half cup of hot coffee and two or three shots of spiced rum. A couple of these and I’m ready for bed (I’ve drank so much coffee over the years that I’m immune to the effects of caffeine, but for anyone with a lower tolerance you might wish to opt for decaf). Then I crawl leap out of bed at the crack of noon on Boxing Day and make certain that whatever I do I don’t have to leave the house and face the hordes of fools shoppers out there in the city.