Redneck Bar & Grill

A farmer named Jon bought a couple horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that he cut the tail of one horse. This worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in
a bush. The hair tore off and the two tails looked pretty much the same length. Jon was stuck again.
The neighbor suggested Jon notch the ear of one horse. That worked fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again Jon couldn’t tell one from the other.
His neighbor suggested he measure the horses to see how tall they were.
When he did, he was very pleased to find that the white horse was 2 inches taller than the black one.

Link to horse related shirts: Horse

I had a near death experience that has changed me forever. The other day I went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. I tried with all my might to hang on, but was thrown off. Just when things could not possibly get worse, my foot gets caught in the stirrup. When this happened, I fell head first to the ground. My head continued to bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down. Just as I was giving up hope and losing consciousness, the Walmart manager came and unplugged it. Thank Goodness for heroes!

Q) What does it mean if you find a horse shoe?

A) Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.