Redneck Bar & Grill

If your goal was to wedge your car like this, you would have to do some serious planning and take three of four runs at it. Maybe you would end up in the hospital. So how did this happen?
Here’s what I figure might have led to the car wedge.
Jimmy borrowed his mom’s car to go over to Todd’s house. He wanted to take the other car,  a new mustang, but she told him there was no way, and gave Jimmy the keys to the stationwagon.
After playing Halo and Oblivion for about 36 hours, Jimmy decided to leave Todd’s house and go home. He borrowed a Korn cd and took off.  He stopped at 7-11 to pick up some grease saturated snacks and an energy drink.
Jimmy opened the bag of doritos, popped the top on the drink and grabbed the Korn cd in one simultaneous move whilst turning onto an offramp near a set of bridges. At this moment his phone went off on the passenger seat.
Jimmy knew better than to answer a cell phone while driving. He remembered how you should keep your eyes on the road. The only thing was, he was waiting for a call from Kate, and he really wanted to talk with anyone that wasn’t a guy.
Chewing fast to get the food out of his mouth, Jimmy reached over and grabbed the phone ,  while at the same time  stopping at a red light and putting the drink in the drink holder. He turned down the music with one hand as he answered the phone with the other and drove the car with his knee on the steering wheel.
When Jimmy pulled into the driveway at his parent’s house, he was so preoccupied that he forgot to take the keys out of the car as he was still on the phone. Some girl whacked out on drugs was walking by checking cars for keys, found this one and took it for a joyride that ended with the car leaving a high bank through a guard rail to crash where this picture was taken.
So really, the cause  is Jimmy leaving the keys in the car. At least he had the sense not to drink and drive.