Redneck Bar & Grill

A farmer in the Eckville bar getting hammered on Blue Beaver Beer. His friend Robert Jones comes 
in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?"

Farmer:
            "Some times life kicks you where it hurts."
         

Robert:
            "So what happened that you are so down?"

Farmer:
            "Well, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. Just as I got the bucket about quarter full, she took her left leg and kicked over the bucket."
         

Robert:
            "Ok, but that’s not so bad."

Farmer:
            "That wasn’t the bad part."
         

Robert:
            "So what happened then?"

Farmer:
            "I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left."
         

Robert:
            "And then?"

Farmer:
            "Well, I sat back down and continued to milk her. Just as I got the bucket about full, she took her right leg and kicked over the bucket."
         

Robert:
            "And that’s why you are in here"

Farmer:
            "No, that wasn’t the bad part."
         

Robert:
            "So, what did you do then?"

Farmer:
            "I took her right leg, and I tied it to the post on the right."
         

Robert:
            "And then?"

Farmer:
            "Well, I sat back down and began milking her again. The bucket was damn near half full, and she smacked it with her tail! It was spilt again."
         

Robert:
            " I still don’t see how come you are in here so early. "

Farmer:
            " I can tell you I was fit to be tied myself, then. But that wasn’t the bad part."
         

Robert:
            "So, then what did you do?"

Farmer:
            "Well, I didn’t have any more rope, so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter. In that moment, my pants fell down and my wife walked in."