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Comment RSSThe Scum of the World: No Offense Intended
1.09.07 # 9:18 # Uncategorized # 3 CommentsI’ve been noticing something a bit odd just in the last six months or so. I frequently get harassed by telephone solicitors, and normally I just blow them off before they can really even get started. If they ask for Mr. or Mrs. Wiegand, I just say, "No they’re not home right now. Can I take a message?" Of course they won’t leave a message, but they will usually ask one of two questions at that point. Either, "When would I be able to reach them?" or, "Are you a member of the household and over 18?" To the former I mention a time when I know I won’t be around, for the latter I say, "No, I’m just the house sitter." They never want to talk to me after that. Lately though they’ve been using a tactic that throws me off. First of all they use my first name, which sometimes fools me into thinking it might be someone I know. Then they say something like, "This is Sue, I don’t know if you remember me or not…" then of course I automatically think that I should know this person. While I’m trying to dredge up the memory, she launches into her spiel. I always want to say something that will mess with the solicitors mind, but I’m just too polite to actually do it. There is one ploy that I thought of, which would make for a very amusing diversion, for me at least.
As soon as she mentions what organization/company she represents, I would say, "Hold on let me get a pen and paper and write this down." Then I set down the phone and make some noise close to it like I’m looking for something. Then I call out like I’m talking to someone else in another room (and I would make sure to pause in between each sentence as if I’m listening to an answer), "Hey, have you seen my pen? My pen! The one that I always keep beside the phone! Well, if it was here I wouldn’t be looking for it would I? I always keep the frickin’ pen beside the frickin’ phone so that I can write things down when I get an important frickin’ call. I never move it so you must have! Why the hell would we keep a pen in the kitchen drawer, what do you need a pen while you’re cooking? Fine I’ll go look for it!" At that point just cover the phone with something to muffle the sound and leave it off the hook. I suspect that fifteen minutes should be plenty for the solicitor to give up. And if she is still on the line when I go back, I guess I could politely listen to the entire spiel before saying no.
That’s what I’d like to do. If any of you want to try it feel free. Just let me know how it works out.
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Well, what I like to do is answer the phone normally. When they ask if Mr. or Mrs. Ebl is there, I say “Yes, just a minute!” Then I put the phone down beside the T.V., or the stereo, or by the children playing loudly. Then I walk away smiling, and return for my phone when I remember too, sometimes a half hour later. Works every time.
Well, I’m in the US and got on the do not call list but every once in a while I still get one. I saw something today that makes me really want another one to call, and soon.
Have a look at this: http://www.rosshetherington.com/?p=169
Dead silence works pretty well. They can’t see you. Are you silent by the phone? Did you go in the other room or out of the house? Did you drop dead? They haven’t a clue, and its the rare breed that hangs around too long under those circumstances.