Redneck Bar & Grill

We’ve all seen it. The world is just clocking along in a fast food line, and then suddenly time stands still and you are trapped behind someone who not only doesn’t notice they are wasting everybody’s day, they wouldn’t care if they did. They might ask, "So, how big are your McWhoppers? Can I get that with no lettuce, no onions, no salt, extra cheese, double ketchup?  I’m allergic to things. Do you have any things in your food?Now, where did I put that card….. will you take a check?"
Maybe they know the person running the till. They might decide this is a good time to catch up on old times while you wait. It isn’t.
They might want to use exact change, which is no problem if it is quickly out on the counter, and exact. "Oh, am I short a dollar? Well, then lets go to time consuming plan B. I’ll just dump my purse on the counter and examine it’s contents for that last dollar, shall I?"  And I shall wait in line behind you.
If you want to be cool, walk up and say something like this, while extending your hand with the cash or other payment at the same time. " Hi, I’ll have 2 burgers, a bottled water and one side ceasar salad, please." Done deal. Now we can move on.
Or, " Could I please have a regular coffee, double double, and one old fashioned donut." Don’t wait until you get to the counter to decide what you want. If you know before you get there, everyone else in line will thank you. And they will all know, even if only subconsciously, that you are one cool cat.
It’s the same at a lounge or bar. You should always know what you want to order before you are asked by the waitress or bartender. I have prepared a helpful line you can memorize for these occasions. Just say, "I’ll have a Blue Beaver Beer, please." Instant cool. You just impressed everyone with your classy choice.
So remember, if you’re feeling blue, grab a Beaver.

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