Subscribe RSS
Comment RSSIt’s Judgement Day in The Matrix
2.03.08 # 7:00 # Current Affairs, Things That Suddenly Occurred To Me # 3 Comments Have any of you noticed this new trend where you live? I’ve been noticing more and more stores are installing self-checkouts. I think the first one I saw was close to a year ago at Home Depot. Then a while back they showed up at Wal-Mart. Just before Christmas I saw them at a Safeway in Calgary and now just the other day when I went down to Superstore, they had them.
I don’t know about you, but I think it’s a good thing. No longer am I forced to make inane small talk with a human cashier. I am not forced to listen to her mis-pronounce my name as she reads it off my membership card. I don’t even have to show any semblance of politeness to these machines. When they demand that I remove my change and receipt, it is perfectly acceptable for me to reply, “I know you are, so what am I?”, and I don’t have to be concerned about hurting it’s feelings.
It is my hope that this brings us one step closer to total automation. When I go to Subway I want to place my order with the computer and then have a robot prepare it for me. Then I can just have my bar-code tattoo scanned and the money will be automatically deducted from my bank account. And the best part is, the Central Super-Computer will keep track of all of my purchases and will help me to find the right things to satisfy all of my desires. Pretty soon we’ll have the Rise of the Machines and we’ll all be put into The Matrix. Then I just just keep taking my blue pills and everything will pure bliss.
This entry was posted by 
I’ve used one exactly once. Then I thought, hey - the price I’m paying includes the wages of a vacant 17-year-old zombie scanning it for me and dammit why should I do the work myself. That being said, these robot filles future you suggest sure will eliminate a lot of the awkwardness that currently is associated with my visits to the massage parlor - so that will be good.
As long as Keenu Reeves is in the Matrix I’ll go there. LOL
If I got a discount for having the machine bark orders at me - “PUT THE ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA!” - then I might be more inclined to use said machine. But since I don’t save any money using the DIY checkout.. I’ll continue sneering at the 17-year-old zombies that get paid to screw it up for me.