Speaking of comics, as I was a while ago, I recently acquired a whole pile of old ones. Some of them certainly display some antiquated notions. One that caught my eye was a descriptive paragraph about a character named “Carol Ferris”. The writer made a special point of specifying that Carol was a “female executive”. I guess back in the early seventies it must have such a new and wondrous thing for women to be working in offices as anything other than a secretary, that they just had to make everyone knew that “Carol” wasn’t actually a man who was an executive.
Another thing that really got me excited was an add on the back page of one comic. It said, “Make someone love you for $3″. It seems that for the low, low price of three bucks you could get a Venus Love Goddess statue. It will apparently work wonders for you.
“When you want to make someone love you, see whether The VENUS LOVE GODDESS attracts that person to you!” “When you’re trying to pick someone up, see whether The VENUS LOVE GODDESS makes you unbelievably charming!”
This thing sounds absolutely astounding. Not only that but this company is offering a double-your-money back guarantee. I’ll bet that this will work better than that voodoo-doll I’ve been using lately.
Wow. That’s just sad. I wonder how many people bought one…
Corrina’s last blog post..There’s A Woodpecker In My Head
Two Venus Love Goddesses for $5??? How can you not take advantage of this once-in-a-lifetime offer?
JD at I Do Things’s last blog post..I Eat (some of the) Lucky Charms so you don’t have to
I bought a couple once long ago and it did make me unbelievingly charming.
Which turned out to be a problem because everyone thought it was an act.
Of course it might have something to do with all the bows I took too.
Brent Diggs and His Witty Humor’s last blog post..Loose Ends
What I wouldn’t give to get my hands on those ‘Expiremint Forms with Actual Love Experiences’! Good times!
You don’t need one of those, we all love the Rad Neck Bar and Grill!
A Venus Love Goddess is unnecessary. Real love only comes through taking time and getting to know someone. And honestly is someone going to sell something with that type of ability for only $3?
Yeah, Howard. Real love costs about $200/hour.
For those readers disappointed that they missed out on this offer, I checked ebay. While I couldn’t find the above statue (I wonder how many were sold?), I did find something even better, the “Venus the Goddess of Love Saan Ha Voodoo Doll”. According to the seller, it is made in Thailand which “ensures quality workmanship made in humane conditions”. If you read this within the next four hours, you can bid on it for the low, low price of $12 plus $7 shipping.
Image the power of Venus PLUS voodoo!
Even more remarkable, it ships from Bockville, ON, CANADA!
I see more than just Blue Beaver Beer comes out of Canada!
~ Steve the “trade show display” guy
hahaha! Ernie, how do you know that real love cost $200?
Ummm…a friend told me so?
The lady just down the street from me has a sale on – $10.00 for ‘pretend love’. Close enough?
wow! really? that is funny. I think it is close enough lol.
Ernie — haha that’s hilarious!
And seriously, the whole Venus love goddess thing? Riiight. I really hope people don’t really believe that…
I remember reading comics and the ads were the best part. Still haven’t seen a sea monkey with a face like a monkey, though.
Louise’s last blog post..Red Lobster Recipes: Shrimp Scampi
Most of the best ads were before my time, but I came across a whole load of old comics when I was in high school. Yeah, the ads were always the best- especially that weird guy looking at the bones in his hand!
That whole venus/voodoo thing made me lol for real. That’s always embarassing at work!
The statue is $3 but shipping and handling is probably $25. If it worked you would wind up paying alot more money in the long run with all the divorce payments.
Nice joke, Ernie.. *rofl*
But shouldn’t we ask ourselfs what the meaning of love is in reality?