Ernie and I both enjoy a good story about an undead critter, like a zombie or a government worker. I know we aren’t alone in our interests. Steve writes about his trade show zombies and the Zombie boot camp, while Petra at Lil Blog of Horrors delves right into all kinds of dark and scary “B” movies. For instance, check out her review of Trailer Park of Terror. Scary stuff, kids!I get the feling that Steve hopes to never see a real zombie or any other kind of horrifying undead. Petra might actually want to run into one though…
Ernie once wrote about The ultimate monster, a werewolf/vampire/zombie hybrid. I gotta tell yah, this idea of a WereZombPire really freaks me out. Can you imagine a hairy monstrosity bending over to bite your neck, and one of his rotten fingers falls right off his paw into your face? Or would he be after your brains, and then change his mind and go for the neck? Can you stop howling at the moon and just kill me and get it over with, already! If you put too many undead superpowers in one critter, it just seems unmanageable. When he changes back from werewolf, is he still a VampZombie or is he human? Does he shuffle along, bumping into walls aimlessly, or is he a “fast” zombie? Can it go outside in the sunlight? And, is it into necrobestiality?
As Ernie pointed out, who would be capable of creating a monster like this? The zombie part would be potentially useful in controlling your undead beastie, but what would be this evil genius’ overall goal? World domination? You would need an army of these things… Or do they infect victims with WVZ cell virus and you become a rotting hairy bloodsucker in short order? It would be a good idea to read up on the possibility of a zombie apocalypse just in case this kind of thing ever happens.
Then of course we get to the Evil Dead, and it turns out that the Evil Dead are Pretty Good Singers. We are both long time fans of this particular undead franchise. I mean, who wouldn’t love a guy who cuts off his own hand and attaches a mean ‘ole chainsaw to the stump, to fight demon infested zombies? With lines like “Wait. Its a trick. Get an axe!” you just can’t go wrong. While I never got to see the musical, Ernie gave it a great review. The evil dead are worse than a regular zombie. If a demon gets into you, you go bad. There doesn’t have to be a bite or wound, they just fly around trying to get you in their insubstantial form, until they do.
One thing I’ve always wondered is, how do zombies move around when its minus 30 C outside? Do they freeze solid and thaw out in the spring, or are they full of some sort of necro antifreeze? I’m betting that today in Alberta, all the zombies are frozen stiff and I can put my necro sledge away for a a bit.
You make a good point about the Evil Dead being worse than zombies. After all — they’re evil! Who says all zombies are necessarily evil? Most don’t even have the emotional capacity for evil, being zombies and all.
Now I’m in the mood to watch Evil Dead. ALL 3 parts!
JD at I Do Things´s last blog ..I’m Throwing a Contest so you don’t have to
“It’s a trick. Get an axe,” is my FAVORITE Evil Dead line. It makes me laugh just to think of it. Now, of course, Bruce Campbell has an easy gig on “Burn Notice” as Michael’s ex-FBI sidekick. He’s just as funny, just older and fatter, the way all humans get.
Marvin´s last blog ..It turned out that . . .
Yeah, I bet there’s not much that can make it through the cold weather you get up there. Brrr….
Nice article:) I like so much your article man, Your blog is one of the most wonderful places to visit. Best regards
JD: I know, I want to watch them this month too.
Marvin: I think that’s my favourite line, too.
Matt: you know, I didn’t see a single zombie today, which I guess supports my frozen undead theory pretty well, don’t you think?
Kolorowanki: I love it that you like so much my article
haha – well, although freezing zomebies would be great if we were to, for instance, hole up in a shopping mall until winter; me thinks that they more likely have some necro antifreeze
matthew@franchises´s last blog ..Treasure Trails
Tim,
Steve
You wrote, “I’m betting that today in Alberta, all the zombies are frozen stiff and I can put my necro sledge away for a a bit.”
I’m begging you, don’t make that mistake! DO NOT PUT AWAY YOUR NECROSLEDGE! You need to always have it handy. You can never be too careful. I don’t know if they are frozen stiff or not, but I wouldn’t chance it.
PS. I hear it works to scare away government workers as well.
Steve@trade show displays guru´s last blog ..Are Trade Shows Obsolete?
I think Food attender are those people who actually maintain the hotel business becasue only their nice presentation people takes food. Anyways keep it up and keep continue.
Your article seems to very interesting and this is one of the best way to attract the readers. I love it! Keep it up.
[...] little while ago Tim furthered my own thoughts regarding the ultimate monster, the Zombie/Vampire/Werewolf hybrid. Tim speculated that zombies [...]
LOL, a good read. And no, vampires and werewolves do really fight, a lot. lol
Ron@Sikat Ang Pinoy´s last blog ..Patricia Bermudez Hizon
That is some entertaining stuff. Never knew that opinions could be this varied. Thanks for all the enthusiasm to offer such funny information here.
Thank you for another funny post! As a new prof-o-blogger, I find commenting tips helpful. It is sometimes hard to find the time to comment, but I fully intend to put your advice to the test this fall. Thanks!
i think a zerepire would be amazing.
necrobestiality? Man have I GOT to get me some of that! Its sounds so sexy! I mean, seriously – don’t you think? Not that I’d ever want to do my dogs or anything gross like that, but hey – surely your “beaver beer” has made you ponder similiar instances…. you know you have and denying it will only make you a closet beaverphile. HHmm…. zombiephilia. It has a certain “Je ne sais quoi” quality to it that is certainly appealing.
anyhoo – Thanks for the thumbs up (that WAS a thumbs up, right?) – sorry I don’t post more often but I do stop by frequently as you guys always make me giggle like a school girl – thanks for that, too!
petra´s last blog ..LBOH’s First Gala Award Event
all of these great creatures are available as fancy dress costuems. Perfect for any halloween drinking party!
Some interesting stuff given over here ,thanks for sharing once again a funny post ,Your blog is one of the most wonderful places to visit, Best regards!
actually my knowledge about this species are pretty low so this post is like very informative for me. thanks for sharing. keep it up
sarika@Laptopaid´s last blog ..Car payment by the loan lenders
I think zombies need to develop a technology to unfreeze themselves and keep themselves warm in the extreme cold conditions so that they can walk the weird way they do without any problems.
Interestingly enough i would think that werewolves would make the best fast food attendents, look at that tv show with Michael J Fox, “Teen Wolf” much easier than a zombie craving “bbrraaiinnnnsss”
Awesome blog, made me laugh every minute of reading it. Thanks for sharing it.
A werewolf, vampire, zombie combination sounds like a creature from the deepest darkside. That would be a truely dangerous combination. Would it be a wolf with even longer vampire fangs moving really slowly with crossed eyes? Who knows – at least you could run away quicker. I am not sure where you would stick the stake if you were trying to kill the vampire element. It could even fly – I think this needs more discussion.
Dan @ Darth Maul Costume´s last blog ..Disclaimer
“One thing I’ve always wondered is, how do zombies move around when its minus 30 C outside? Do they freeze solid and thaw out in the spring, or are they full of some sort of necro antifreeze? I’m betting that today in Alberta, all the zombies are frozen stiff and I can put my necro sledge away for a a bit.”
Haha I love this line of the blog post and I bet you’re spot on with the guess
I agree, the Evil Dead are worse than zombies! It’s fun to go to zomibe /horror cons and see thousands of people walking around dressed like zombies!
Scary stuff are happening now brothers and sisters. Iran and Oilspill and all that stuff. God bless you all!
Such entertaining and funny. I love watching horror movies too but I havent watched the Evil Dead. I dont want zombies and yuckie-scenes when Im watching. But let me think of watching them.