This past week-end I made the acquaintance of a new beer.  Now, whenever I meet a new beer I feel kind of shy and nervous.  Blue Beaver Beer is and always will be my first love, but we have an open relationship.  I am allowed to drink other beers and other men are allowed to drink Blue Beaver.  Still I try to limit how many others I “become familiar with”.

On the week-end though, I was introduced to Maple Amber Ale from the Banff Brewing Company.  My first taste was quite brief, but it was intense.  I immediately overcame my shyness and took a second, much longer taste.  As I savoured it, I tasted a smooth, rich  creaminess not often found in beer.  Then, of course, there was the sweet flavour of genuine Canadian maple syrup.  There may have been a time when I said I would only drink beer flavoured beer; but let me tell you friends, after those two sips, I became one of the converted.

My first taste was slow and sweet and lingering and just a little shy.  My second taste was not.  When I found myself desperately yearning for another sample of the Maple Amber Ale; I ran over, grabbed it and downed took it hard and quick like some sort of wild animal.  Alas, our relationship was over all too quickly.  We both had to go our separate ways.  However, while I can seek comfort in the embrace of the Blue Beaver; I will be searching for my new maple lover ale.

I was out for a drive the other day, and I decided to take the path less travelled. Boy, did it ever make a difference. I came around a bend in the road and I saw this by the side of the road:

Now, it’s not all that uncommon to find beer cans in the ditch (there are still a few dirty, filthy litterbugs out there), but these ones were still full. Almost as astonishing as that was the fact that they were close to 10 feet tall! I did a little bit of calculating (I asked J.D. to do it so I wouldn’t have to, but she was busy) and I determined that the owner of these cans would have to be somewhere between 120 and 144 feet tall.

I was seriously considering climbing up and getting into one of these cans, but then I thought, “What if I drown in there?” Then I thought, “What a way to go!” Then I thought, “What if the owner comes back and finds me in there? What do I do when I find a bug in my beer? I just fish it out then flick it off my finger as hard as I can without caring whether or not it lives, after all it’s only a bug.” Then I thought, “Well, maybe that’s not such a good way to go.”

So I just took some pictures of the cans to prove that I really saw them and then I drove off, thinking about what a great story this would make when I got back to the bar.

So, lately I’ve sort of been thinking that my day job is an awful lot like “Survivor“. survivor.JPGFirst of all I have to hang out with a bunch of strangers, very few (if any) of whom I would ever choose to associate with. Next I’m forced to to stay at a small self-contained locale, not unlike an island.

In my first couple of weeks at this job I was presented with a few challenges, most of which I won, and I just sort of took my time to understand the game without taking too many risks. Gradually, I was presented with more challenges, then I made some alliances and slowly became well-liked by my fellow castaways co-workers. I was able to survive a few eliminations and I even got immunity a couple of times.

It didn’t take me very long to become the leader of my tribe; and I survived many more eliminations. A little while back I became the back-up hunter/gatherer shipper-receiver for the whole island. Now after one more elimination, I have moved up another spot to become the head shipper/receiver. If this trend continues, next I should become the Jeff Probst of my job and then the Mark Burnett.

Outwit – well, if you knew the kind of people I work with you’d know that’s not even a little bit difficult to do
Outlast – the ladies will tell you how well I can outlast other guys
Outplay – I never play at work; ’cause work isn’t fun, work is work

So I was wandering around the city today, just taking in the sights.  When you grow up in Redneck country, a city with a population of 85, 000+ seems to be filled with endless wonders.  And today was no different.  I saw a truck pass by and the name on the door said, “Low Speed Transport”.

I thought to myself, “What an amazing place we live in that offers such choice in how quickly you want your freight moved.”

I’m sure lot’s of people have had a feeling the “Rapid Trucking” or “We Move It Now” were just too fast.  They need things transported but there’s really no rush at all.  Anytime within the next six or seven months should be just fine.  It makes me wonder if this concept would work in a restaurant.  You could come in tonight and place your order and then come back tomorrow to eat it.  How about low speed blogging; all of you can keep coming back everyday to see what’s new at The Redneck and I’ll just write whenever I get around to it.

Hey, wait a minute…