Better Than Facebook

Is there someone from your past that you have lost contact with.  Perhaps someone you went to school with or a former co-worker or maybe an ex boy/girlfriend.  Have you recently found yourself wondering what they’ve been up to recently or maybe how they look now.  Do you want to know personal information about them without them finding out that you’ve been inquiring?  Then you need to become a member of the brand new Stalk-Book.

With Stalk-Book you can find out where your ex is working now.  You can find out the home address of that cute waitress who wouldn’t even give you the time of day when you were working with her as a dishwasher.  Maybe you want to find out what route that hunky water delivery boy drives so that you can follow him discreetly to watch as he flexes his big sweaty muscles and bends down to pick up those heavy water jugs.  Join now to find all of these people that you could never bring yourself to approach in real life.

Basic membership is free.  All you have to do is provide your own personal information including; name, maiden name, former aliases, current address, last five addresses, last seven jobs, all schools attended, make, model and license number of personal vehicle as well as any company vehicles, and work, home and cell phone numbers. Your personal information is stored on your own page along with all the photos ever taken of you.  Our privacy policy ensures that your page can not be viewed by anyone that we do not approve as a member.

Anyone can become a member of Stalk-Book.  After your membership is approved you will have access to any other members’ profile pages.  You can search using any name you know the person by.  In some case you can also use descriptive phrases, provided there is adequate information.  For example: “that hot blonde chick who worked as a server at Shenaniganz from June 1999 to October 2000” will narrow down your options quite a bit.  However, “that hot guy I saw at the mall on Tuesday” is far too large of a parameter.

If you wish to purchase our Platinum Membership (for only 169.95/year) you will also have access to the regular times that other members usually take a shower as well as any and all videos featuring our members that have ever been uploaded.  At Stalk-Book we pride ourselves on being a better service for finding people without alerting them to your interest than Facebook and MySpace combined.

December 15, 2009 | | Tags: , , , | 68 Comments »

Facebook “Feeding Frenzy” Leaves Lonely Losers In Drug Rehab

Now, I’m certain that if you just took a little time you would have no trouble at all finding a vast plethora of internet sites that will give you all sorts of (vaguely) useful advice on how to increase website traffic. As Tim pointed out recently while doing backflips for backlinks, you could always go on Facebook and join dozens of different “groups”. Then all you have to do is constantly leave witty comments on all of the pages and hope that some of the other members will go back to your page and from there go to your main web site where they will then do whatever they have to in order to for you to get paid and/or increase your traffic flow. It’s just as easy as that.

A lot of people out there are also using My Space as a place to promote what ever it is that they do that they wish they could get paid for; whether it be recording music, creative writing, live web cams, or proof-reading new dictionaries. Some people prefer this because anyone can access their information instead of just their 2563 close personal “friends”.

The only problem with these social networking sites is that they are highly addictive. You have to log on several times a day and change your status, check to see what your thousands of “friends” are doing right this minute, add the 12 newest applications, or attack a bunch of people with your zombie/werewolf/vampire/slayer/pirate/school girl. And you have to spend time visiting and leaving comments with all of the multitudes of groups that you have joined. If you’re really lucky you’ll still mange to get two hours of sleep every night.

One other solution is to make several videos that are somehow relevant to your web site and then post them on some of the 6052 YouTube-like sites on the internet. Again all you would have to do it wait for people to make their way back to your home page. I’m certain that within a few months your hits will increase by…eight or more and you’ll be laughing all the way to the virtual bank.

Pretty soon though, they’ll need to make some sort of a free drug rehab program just for Facebook addicts. It will most likely be a two-step program. Step 1: cancel your account and never go back there again. Step 2: leave the house and interact with real live people. (Just for the record that second step is not something that I would ever personally endorse.) Come to think of it there’s probably already a support group for Facebook addicts; you should be able to join it on Facebook.

March 9, 2009 | | Tags: , , , , , | 52 Comments »